The Gherkin Isn't Working
Swiss Re, the owner of the Erotic Gherkin, is finding London's newest skyscraper hard to let. Why is that?
- Potential tenants mishear "crystal phallus" and think it is Crystal Palace, SE19.
- Potential tenants experience deep-seated insecurity and a vague sense of unease when approaching the building.
- In this time of downsizing, staff wary of moving to any building with the word "axe" in the street address.
- Floorplans dramatically decrease in size when the weather is cold.
- The thick, curly undergrowth that surrounds the base of the tower is offputting.
- The tower provides too many opportunities for lazy internet satirists to make cheap nob jokes.