Sunday, November 07, 2004

The Quality of Hosiery

After the failure of Guy Fawkes’ plot to blow up the Houses of Parliament, several vital changes were made to Commons security. They included:

- Sergeants were no longer equipped with flimsy 15-denier tights but instead moved up to the much more robust 40 denier, which is better at preventing laddering.

- The guards at the gates were instructed to first check if anyone had ordered 40 barrels of explosives before waving them through.

- War was declared with France. The French had not been involved with the plot, but they were known to have gunpowder, they had certainly used gunpowder in the past, and frankly it was the sort of thing they were likely to do. Besides, invading France just felt like the right thing to do.

- It was decided that the Commons cellars could no longer be allowed to remain empty, so they we safely filled up with firewood kindling, tar paper, lamp oil, blotting paper and old curtains.

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War was declared with France. The French had not been involved with the plot, but they were known to have gunpowder, they had certainly used gunpowder in the past, and frankly it was the sort of thing they were likely to do. Besides, invading France just felt like the right thing to do.Good to know some things never change.

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